It’s almost 10 months since I first met Hermann through the famous iDate Ladyboy dating site.
Now, I’m typing this on my i-pad just an hour’s flight away from Munich. Once I get to Munich I will transfer and take a train to Stuttgart, Hermann’s home town.
I’m so excited to finally be heading to Germany to live. Just hoping that Immigration and Customs don’t have any issue with my visa, ID card or luggage, respectively. You never know how they will treat a Ladyboy traveling alone and arriving into a foreign country. Especially into Germany, as this is where a lot of Thai Trans women head for. Then, unfortunately, they start working illegally or overstay their visas. This makes it harder for legitimate visa holders, more particularly Ladyboys, to get a visa back in Thailand.
Anyway, I got my visa with Hermann’s help, partly as he used to work in the German Embassy in Bangkok. But, I must add quickly, that’s not the main reason how I got my visa!
It took a long time and we had to prove that we were in a serious relationship, showing photographs of our time together. Then there was all sort of other paperwork I had to present. In fact, maybe it’s best I start at the beginning from the time I first joined iDateLadyboys and tell you how I ended up on this flight into Germany.
I’d had my gender confirmation surgery in April and decided to join a Ladyboy dating site once everything had healed. This was in early August if I remember correctly. I’d known I was Transgender ever since I was young, around 8 or 9. First I had breast augmentation surgery when I was 17. At that time, I’d been on hormones for over two years and was patiently saving up for the rest of my surgery. As soon as I felt I was ready, I joined iDateLadyboys with the aim of looking to meet a nice, sincere man for a long-term relationship.
Hermann contacted me after I’d been on the site for about one week. Luckily for me he was working at the German Embassy in Bangkok, as I mentioned. So, it was easy for us to meet up if we wanted. He told me that he had always had an interest in Ladyboys. Yet, surprisingly, even though he had lived in Bangkok for almost two years he’d had no success with finding the right Ladyboy or Trans woman. “All I ever seem to meet is bar girls or ladies who are not compatible with me,” I recall him saying.
He also said that given his senior position working for the Embassy it was better for him to be discrete. He didn’t really want all of his colleagues to know that he was looking for a Ladyboy as his long-term partner. So, using a specialized online Ladyboy dating site was ideal for him as he could meet T-girls from the comfort of his apartment. No need for him to cruise around the bars and clubs of Bangkok (and there are a lot!) looking for his perfect Trans match. No need to waste time getting ready and failing to meet a Trans-woman who he was interested in. “I like the fact that dating sites such as iDateLadyboy are quick and easy to join and are specialized in what they do. You know that every woman on there is Transgender and she knows that the men know! No misunderstandings and embarrassing situations when the man suddenly find out his “lady” is a T-girl.
In fact, I said much the same thing to Hermann albeit from a Trans woman’s point of view. Nowadays security and safety are very important to Ladyboys. Even though there is more awareness about us, it seems that there are still lots of bigots and “Transphobes” out there who can be aggressive and unpleasant. An online dating site allows us to get to know the man we are chatting with before we meet. We can do our best to see if we are compatible, without leaving our computer screens. Certainly, for me, I always asked men who contacted me about their intentions. For example, I’d ask questions such as: Are they looking for a long-term relationship or just a quick fling to satisfy their curiosity about T-girls? How much do they really know about Ladyboys? Plus: Why do they wish to date a Trans woman?
Happily, for Hermann and I, we hit it off almost straight away. Even our hobbies and likes about food (both vegetarians) seemed to match. We found we had a lot in common and talked online every day for about two weeks. When we finally met, we just sort of know we were right for each other.
Hermann’s posting in Bangkok came to an end and he is now waiting to see where his next assignment will be. We hope to be able to spend the next two or three months at least in Germany and then see where we might move to. It all depends on which posting comes up for Hermann. I just hope it’s to a place where Ladyboys are welcome!
In any event, I know I could not have met such a nice man without iDateLadyboy, and so will be forever grateful to the site!