What a ladyboys, and what she is NOT

iDate Ladyboy is one of the most popular, specialized dating sites for Transgender women. It has a great reputation for matching Ladyboys with the men who wish to date, build relationships with and maybe even marry them. Week after week, month after month, men visit the site and reach out to some of the Trans-women whose profiles are listed on thereon.

Over the last 5 or 6 years, with the increased visibility and awareness about Transgender women, the number of foreign men looking to date Ladyboys has grown exponentially. Yet, there are still some uncertainties about just exactly what is a Trans woman. But, perhaps, more importantly, some myths still abound that need to be clarified once and for all. These relate to what a Ladyboy is not.

Ladyboys are often mis-labelled

So, let’s start with what she is not first. A Ladyboy is not:

  • a drag queen. One of the most common misconceptions is that drag queens are Trans women. No, they are not. Drag queens are usually, but not always, gay men who like to dress up as women for entertainment purposes. They will most times over-exaggerate the body shape (huge or oversize breasts or posteriors) and the make-up and hairstyles of women. Outlandish, bright make-up or wigs with masses and masses of hair. In essence, they are parodying women for the purposes of so-called entertainment: lip-syncing to songs and telling risqué jokes.

In the past, drag queens were usually subtler. Then the term used for drag queens was female impersonators. They might dress in elegant evening gowns and sing (not lip-synch) and put on a show to an older, mixed audience looking to be entertained. Modern drag queens tend to be much more flamboyant and few, if any, aspire to be women. Wearing a dress is just part of the job.

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Trans women they are not!

  • necessarily gay.  This is, possibly, the second most common misconception. But, no again. Ladyboys are emotionally and mentally female. They may have some parts of their body which appear male, ie broad shoulders or strong chin. Or they may have an extra appendage between their legs at birth. But, fundamentally, Trans women are female. If they like men they do not consider themselves to be gay. If they like women, you can argue that they are lesbians assuming that they have completed their transition.

When the general public makes an assumption that all Ladyboys are gay, they are more often than not thinking of the male to female Transgender person who ends up in a relationship with a male. But as we all know gender is a very wide spectrum and stereotypical assumptions are usually wrong!

Stereotypes of Ladyboys abound

  • necessarily confined to working in a cabaret show in a tourist destination or in a bar or nightclub and offering sexual services. The percentage of Transgender women who do work in cabaret or bars is tiny. Most Ladyboys live “under the radar” as it were. Many have Bachelor’s or Master’s degrees from a good university or have good, solid managerial type office jobs in the government or private sector. Others may be doctors or dentist or other professional fields. Then, in Asia at least, there are thousands upon thousands of T-girls working in shopping centers, cosmetic stores and hairdressers. Indeed, you may never know when you are being served in some shops that the staff who served you was a Ladyboy;
  • someone who has had all sorts of operations to make her look like a female. Many Trans women, again especially in Asia, naturally have the characteristics of genetic or cis-gendered females. Relatively small body frames, sleight build and facial bone structures (ie high cheekbones) which give a feminine appearance all combine to make many Asian males look like females before they start. Of course, breast implants are a necessity for most Ladyboys to achieve the overall body shape they desire.

Having said all of this about what a T-girl is not, then what is a Ladyboy?

Well, she is likely to be someone:

  • who was wrongly assigned male at birth. Such designation being solely based on her genitals and without any reference to her mental outlook;
  • whose mind and emotions do not match her body features. Instead of a vagina and breasts she has a penis. She may well have no ovaries and cannot reproduce. But in all other aspects she is female;
  • who is on the road to correcting (or has already corrected) the aforementioned issues so that her mind and emotions will finally match her body appearance;
  • who is just another, normal human being with hopes and aspirations and goals, just like any other person in this world; and who:
  • is looking for nice, genuine, sincere man to love, cherish and take care of them, just like any other woman. This is, in fact probably the main reasons Ladyboys woman join iDate Ladyboy in the first place!